How Your Get-Freaky Playlist is Unexpectedly Holding Back Your Sex Life

Curating the perfect seduction soundtrack is an artform unto itself. Its mood setting potential is not to be taken for granted — and neither is its potential to help boost you to bold new brinks in the bedroom. Your get-freaky playlist is probably overdue for a remix and here’s why.

-It’s reminding you of your exes.-

Tough but true. If you’ve cycled through the same collection of songs with several partners, it may be time to hit the refresh button. Neurological studies have shown that listening to familiar music activates the specific parts of the brain that deal with autobiographical memory. We’re not saying that your jerkwad ex-girlfriend has to taint Portishead’s first two albums for you eternally, just that your old associations may be affecting your ability to make new ones.

-It’s “your jam,” and it’s stealing the spotlight.-

You know that part of every Kanye song that you cannot physically restrain yourself from singing along to? Maybe it’s best to save that one for the shower playlist. Scratch the songs that you know every word to by heart, so that you’re not running away with them in the back of your mind — or worse, out loud. Your selection should compliment and intensify the moment, not distract from it. No coitus karaoke, please. (Although, I would totally forgive a “damn, what would Jeromey-romey-romey-rome think!” mid-makeout. As long as the pants were still on.)  

-It’s one-dimensional.-

Like all epic sex, your playlist should probably include a broad palette of different dynamics, tempos, volumes, moods, and characters. Duh. Risk-taking has been proven to increase arousal and receptiveness to sensory stimulation, so don’t be afraid to take liberties on the range of your bedroom jams, at the very least.  

-It’s too obvious.-

D’Angelo’s new album is super sexy to listen to when I’m cooking you a meal in my undies, but mid-bone, it actually kind of makes me feel like I’m stuck in a deleted scene from a low-budge 70’s blaxploitation film. Sorry. But a little nuance never hurt anybody. Ditch the chicka-chicka-bow-wow bangers. We don’t need it spelled out for us.  

-It’s not turning your boo on.-

However, if your playlist is not broken, you may want to consider rebooting your boo.

Here are our tips for soundtracking your sex life to scintillating new heights:

1. Don’t hog the DJ booth. Sharing is caring.

2. Songs in other languages are where it’s at. Not only is that breathy Portuguese murmur super sexy — it also doesn’t have the problem of carrying you away with its lyrical message. You get all of the pretty vocals without the chatter. Lindo maravilhoso!

3. Shuffle. Always shuffle. There are few things in life worse than choreographed sex. Keep it random. Why not try:

FKA Twigs – Papi Pacify

Animal Collective – Bluish

Os Mutantes – Le Premier Bonheur de Jour

Bjork – The Pleasure is All Mine

Jai Paul – Jasmine

Rhye – Open

Lorde – Biting Down

Jorge Ben Jor – Oba, La Ven Ela

Boards of Canada – Sick Times

Feel free to post any additional suggestions in the comments. Best of luck, and happy scoring.

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